Looking Back, Moving Forward
by bhicks07
Summary: When Jude’s husband is in a coma she is forced to stop and reminisce about the struggles and triumphs throughout their lives together..from births to fights to weddings.. Just give it a try.
1. The Call

A/N: Hey everyone. This is my first Instant Star Fan Fic. I hope you guys like it. Please read and review.

Summary: When Jude's husband is in a sudden, life threatening accident it forces her to stop and reminisce about the struggles and triumphs throughout their lives together. Please Read. Just give it a try.

I do not own Instant Star or their characters. I do own my own created characters.

A/N: Italics will be Jude reminiscing.

**Chapter 1: The Call**

All Jude could think about was the fight she had just had with her husband. She hated the way they fought about the stupidest things. This one was over their daughter, Madison. Madison, who was 15, was at the age where she wanted to go out with her friends. Jude thought it was time for her to go out. Madison's father, on the other hand, thought differently.

The phone ringing brought Jude back to life.

'Mom, it's for you.' Madison yelled from the upstairs.

'What? Ok, thanks' Jude yelled back while walking over the table and picking up the black cordless phone.

'Hello'

'Hello. Jude?' The man's sharp voice boomed over the telephone.

'This is she. May I ask who's calling?'

'Jude, this is Dr. Robertson from St. Frances Medical Center. There has been a terrible accident regarding your husband. I need you come to the hospital as soon as possible.'

'What? An accident? Is he ok?Yes I'll be there as soon as I can.' And with that Jude hung up the telephone.

She didn't know what to do. She had to get to the hospital. She called her sister, Sadie. They were still close, as close as two sisters could be.

After Sadie got to Jude's house, Jude and Sadie left for the hospital not saying a word.

'_Mom, Dad. I really want to go out with Tyler, Elizabeth, and Jason tonight. I'm 15 almost 16, and you guys still haven't let me go out with them. Both Tyler and Jason are 16 and they are great drivers. We will be ok. I promise!' Madison pleaded to her parents._

'_Madison. I think it's a great idea and I think it's about time that you went out with your friends' Jude said smiling at her red headed 15 year old daughter._

'_Jude. I don't think you should make decisions like this without discussing it with me first.' Jude's tall husband said standing up and walking over to Jude. 'Madison, please go upstairs and let me and your mother discuss this.'_

_They both watched silently as Madison got to her feet and sadly walked up the stairs._

'_I don't see why she can't go. I was 15 and I wanted this so badly. I wanted to go with my friends and my parents let me go. Why can't you just let her go?' Jude asked her husband looking into his blue eyes._

'_Because I was a 16 year old boy at one time. I don't know if I can trust them with her.' He said looking into his wife's big green eyes. _

'_I was 15 when I met you and look how I turned out. I never did anything bad.' Jude replied getting slightly upset with her husband._

'_I know you but that's different. When I first met you I wanted nothing more than to be with you. I just don't trust the guys.'_

'_Why can't you just except the fact that she is a big girl and can take care of herself. She is a smart girl and will not do something stupid.' Jude replied now yelling at her husband._

'_Jude. I have to go to work. Please don't let her go out tonight. We can discuss this later when I get home tonight.' He replied kissing his wife on the forehead. _

'_Ok! I love you!' Jude replied._

'_I love you too girl! Always have and always will' _

_And with that he walked out of the door into the cold night. _

'Jude, Jude. Are you ok? We're at the hospital now. Come on lets go in.'

'Sade. I don't know if I can go in. What if something bad has happened to him. What if he's dead. I cant' handle it. The last time I talked to him, we were arguing about Madison wanting to go out. How am I going to deal with this? What if he is dead. How am I supposed to tell our kids that their father is dead?' Jude replied with tears constantly falling down her cheeks.

'Listen to me Jude! You don't know any of this. The only way to know for sure to get out of this car and go in and check on him. Jude, he's a fighter and he loves you and them 2 kids more than anything else in the world. He will be ok' Sadie replied. Giving a little bit of hope to Jude.

With that Jude and Sadie headed into the hospital.

Please tell me what you think. Please review and I hope you liked this story. Review and if you like it, I'll keep posting.


	2. You Can Never Forget Your First Love

Please continue to read and review and I will keep posting. I have a good idea for this story and the more you review, the more I'll post and the quicker. I promise

To the reviewers:

-x-alexzfan4ever-x-: Thanks so much for being my first reviewer I really appreciate it. As for you hoping her husband is Tommy. I guess you'll have to read and find out.

iheartheclash: Thank you so much for letting me know that Jude's eye color was wrong. I appreciate that and I'll fix it in upcoming chapters. I hope you like this chapter.

Here's chapter 2. Hope you like!

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Chapter 2: You Can Never Forget Your First Love 

'Jude. I'm glad that you got here so quickly.' Dr. Robertson said greeting Jude as she walked into the hospital doors.

'How is he?' Was all that left Jude's mouth.

Dr. Robertson could see how worried she was. He'd known for a very long time. For about 16 years. He was the one to deliver Madison and then 12 years later when Jude's baby boy, Austin was born.

'I'm not going to lie to you. Jude, he isn't doing so good. He's in a coma and we're not sure when he'll pull it. Could be 2 hours or could be 2 years. Could be never. We just aren't sure. He hasn't gotten better since he's been here, but he hasn't gotten worse either.' Dr. Robertson replied sadly to Jude's question.

'I understand. Can I see him?' Was all that Jude asked.

'Of course, right this way.' Dr. Robertson replied showing Jude into a room.

When Jude walked into the room, she didn't know what to do. There was her husband laying in that bed with all them monitors and stuff hooked up to him.

Jude walked over to him and held his hands.

'Tommy.' She replied. 'Tommy, I love you! I have every since the first day I saw you. I need you to pull through this. Tommy, I know that you will pull through this. You are so strong. With everything that's happened with us, I know that you can pull through this.'

Jude was now in tears. She was bawling her eyes out. She didn't know what to say. She was so scared that Tommy, the love of her life, wasn't going to pull through. She needed him to pull through.

'Tommy. I need you to pull through. I can't live without you.' Jude just sat there holding Tommy's hands crying.

_'Tommy. What are you doing? You are being so hot and cold with me. I can't handle it anymore. I know that when we just kissed you felt something. I felt it and I know you did too. Tommy, don't hold back on me. I'm 18 now. I know that's why you haven't done anything about us. That's why you left and are just now returning. I'm 18 now Tommy. I've heard that excuse for 3 years now. That I was too young. Every time we kissed, that it didn't happen. That I wasn't 18 so nothing could happen. I didn't understand then. I don't understand now either. I am 18 and I'm not going to say that that kiss didn't just happen and that I didn't feel anything because I did. And you cant say you didn't feel anything either, because I won't believe you. Tommy, I love you. I always have and always will. That will never change. Why can't you just see that? You were my first love, Tommy. You can never forget your first love.' Jude screamed at Tommy with tears running down her face._

_'Jude. I know. I did run. Do you not realize how much I loved you back when you were 16, 17. When you were even 15. Jude from the first time I met you, I felt an instant attraction to you. I am not going to run anymore. I'm tired of running. Because I do love you too. Jude, you need to make sure this is what you want. Because if it is, I won't be able to handle myself. You will be mine and all mine and I won't give you up for nothing. Jude, I love you. I always have and I always will.' Tommy replied._

_And with that Tommy and Jude shared the longest, best kiss of Jude's life_.'

'Tommy. I was just thinking about the time when we first officially got together. It was the week after my 18th. Do you remember? I do. You had just returned back from Europe. I had waited so long for you to return back. I was so excited. I was finally 18 and we could be together finally. When we finally kissed, it was the best kiss of my life.' Jude said to Tommy still crying.

'Tommy. Remember when I told you, that you can never forget your first love? I meant it. I can never forget you. I can't let you sit here and die. I need you Tommy. I need you to pull through. I can't finish raising Madison and Austin by myself.' Jude said.

'Jude.' Sadie interrupted her. 'Jude, I think you should let Madison know what's going on. Jude she loves him so much. He is her hero. She will never forgive you if you don't call her or go to her and let her know.'

'You're right Sade. Can you take me home?' Jude asked.

'Sure sis!'

'Ok, I'll be right back.' And with that Jude let herself back into Tommy's room.

'Tommy. I love you. I've gotta go let Maddy know what's going on. I love you Tommy and I'll be back. Pleas stay strong for me Tommy. Please. I'll be back.'

And with that Jude kissed Tommy on the forehead as she walked out of the door.

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A/N: Ok guys! I hope you liked this chapter as well as the last one. I know..This one didn't have much of a flash black…but I felt it needed to be there..it was the first time Jude and Tommy were able to admit their love for each other. I know this chapter was kind of crummy..but I felt that this stuff needed to be put in here..you'll see where I'm going more later within the story. I will continue and try to put as many flashbacks as possible in her. Of course, as the story progresses, there will be births and marriage proposals and a few marriages also. Please review and let me know what you think! If something isn't right or you think I need to fix something, let me know. Thanks guys! 


	3. Looking At You

**A/N: **Thanks for the reviews. I'm so sorry that it's taken me a while to get this chapter posted. It's been a busy holiday for me. I have gotten this chapter finsihed however, and it's long. I will also post another one tomorrow..hopefully that will make up for my lack of posting. I really hope you like this story and this chapter. Please say so whether you do or don't. Also after you read this chapter, my story will start to have more suspense and more characters in it. I hope you like this. Well enjoy.

**Disclaimer:** Again I do not own Instant Star…if I did I wouldn't be writing these silly fics and I would have already had Jude and Tommy together on the show. I only own what I make up.

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**Chapter 3: Looking At You**

"Kat, it's been a week. A week since Tommy was put in the hospital. He has not made any progress. I just don't know what to do. He has to wake up. My kids can't take this much longer. I…I can't take this much longer. My family is falling apart without Tommy here to hold us together."Jude cried to her best friends.

Jude looked into Kat's big brown eyes and saw that her best friend was still there for her. They had had their falling outs over the years with Jamie. But, now Jamie and Kat are together and they are very happy. Jude couldn't help but smile as she saw her best friends caring brown eyes looking at Jude.

"Jude. You can't talk like Tommy is already dead. You're making it seem like he is gone and there is no way he is going to pull out of this. Tommy will pull out of this. He is strong…a fighter…just look at him…he is Lil' Tommy Q. Tommy Quincy. He is going to pull through. You and them kids in there are his whole life. You know that, hell Jude, everyone knows that. You just gotta have hope and pray. Pray to God that Tommy will make it through." Kat comforted her best friend.

"Kat. Thank you. Thank you so much for being here for me and my kids. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have you, Jamie, and Sadie here to help me get through this. You are.." Jude responded but was cut off.

"Beautiful…Lovely…The love of my life." Jamie cut Jude off as he walked into the kitchen. "How are you?" Jamie asked as he gave Kat a quick kiss on the lips and turned to Jude.

"Hey Jamie. How's it going?" Jude asked her other best friend. The friend who had always been there for her, the friend she would never forget.

"I'm good. How are you? Any news about Tommy? Have you been to the hospital today?" Jamie turned to ask the red head sitting at his kitchen table.

"I'm good…as good as can be expected…I haven't heard about Tommy and I haven't been to the hospital today. I can't leave my kids alone." Jude began rumbling.

Before she knew it she was being led to the door by Jamie on one side and Kat on the other.

"Jude, honey. I'm going to stay here with Madison, Austin, and Kensley." Kat said as she walked over and picked her 18 month old little girl out of her pink high chair, "and Jamie, over here, is going to drive you to the hospital. I'll feed the kids and bring them to the hospital later to see Tommy. You need to be there for him."

About 30 minutes later Jude was sitting by her husband's side. Like she had done the past 7 days. She was just sitting there holding his hand and staring at his blue eyes, which were always open, not doing a thing. This time they were like they had been for the past 7 days, open not doing a thing.

"Tommy. Hey honey. It's me, Jude. How are you doing today? The doctors said you're not making any progress, but that can't be true. I know it can't. You've been here 7 days. 7 days Tommy, 158 hours. You've been in the hospital for over 100 hours. I know that you're making progress. You have to be…for us, Tommy. Me, you, Madison, and Austin. Our family. Tommy, I love you…" Jude continuously talked to her husband.

Jude walked out into the studio. It was her first time being back in the studio in a year and she had to admit, it felt right. It felt right to have Tommy there by her side. They had been dating for 2 years. Jude was fixing to turn 20 and she loved Tommy with all her heart. Everything that she did, she wanted him to be there by her side. Georgia, EJ, Kwest, everyone knew about their dating. Tommy and Jude eventually told them about a half-year after they had been dating. Jude couldn't help but to think back to their responses…

'_Guys, we have something to tell you. Can you all sit down please?' Jude said as soon ad Georgia, EJ, and Kwest walked into the conference room._

_They just looked back and forth from Tommy to Jude. They didn't know what to think. Jude just had a huge grin on her face, but Tommy, he had a straight face…they couldn't read it._

'_Jude…Tommy? What is this about? I need to be working…you two need to be working.' Georgia said nervously sitting down._

'_Well. Guys. We figured that it was time you knew the truth.' Jude started._

'_We have been keeping a secret from you guys and it's time you know the truth…Jude and I…well, we have been dating for the past 6 months. We felt bad that we didn't tell you. .but we wanted to be sure that this would work out..and it has so here we are.' Tommy finished grabbing Jude's hand seeing the nervous look in here blue eyes._

'_Come on. Someone say something.' Jude said nervously._

'_Well. It's about time you let us know. We all knew it was coming…I knew already…you just don't know how many times, I've been here just as late as you two have.' Georgia was the first to reply who had a huge grin on her face._

'_Tommy man. I can't believe you didn't tell me. I can't believe you left this a secret for so long.' Kwest said a little disappointed. 'But, I'm so happy for you too. You belong together.'_

Jude snapped out of it as she looked back at Tommy laying in the hospital bed. He looked so helpless. She just didn't know what to do...all she knew was she had to get out of there before she lost herself and woulnd't be able to get up…

"Tommy. I love you and I'll see you later. Stay healthy." And with that Jude kissed her husband on the forehead and walked out the door.

Little did Jude know, that she was not the only one who was watching Tommy. Jude and Tommy had been watched for the past hour as Jude sat in Tommy's hospital room talking to him and reminiscing.

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**A/N:** Haha a little bit of acliffhanger. Not a big one though.Don't worry I know where this is going and I promise you'll like it at the end. I wonder what you think is going to happen and who is watching Jude and Tommy….leave in your review and if you have a good idea on who it could be…I couldn't always change the story to fit that….but I do have an idea…just read and review please…thanks

-Brandy-


	4. Daddy's Little Girl

**A/N:** Hey everyone. Thanks again for coming and reading my story. I know that it has been a while since it's been updated, and I'm really sorry, but I'm here to make up for that now. I just had a busy couple of weeks. With New Year's...hope everyone's was great...mine was ok…I was stuck babysitting...so yea…and then school started back this week, so yea, that's going to be stressful with studying and homework and posting too….well, enough about this…on with the story. Oh and by the way, I will deal with the person watching…just not yet.

**Disclaimer**: Of course, I don't own Instant Star…if I did...Jude and Tommy would defiantly be together...as I've already said many times.

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**Chapter 4: Daddy's Little Girl**

"Hi daddy. It's me…Madison." The small 15 year old said as she closed the door to the hospital room.

"How are you today? I'm alright…just kinda rough…you know." The red haired blue eyed girl sat down in the chair by her father that was usually being occupied her mother…if not Jude then Kwest, EJ, or Georgia was in it.

"Daddy…I can't lie to you…you know I never could. It's been hard….it's been hard at school, everyone who wasn't my friend before pretends to be and asks questions constantly like 'how's lil' tommy Q' or 'are you guys ok, because I'd be so upset.' It just hurts. My friends, they don't really help too much either…I know they try to but it just doesn't work. They try to take my mind of you, but it doesn't help…maybe for a minute or two and then I feel guilty because I'm having a good time or I'm smiling and laughing, and you…you're stuck here lying in this stupid bed.

Jude walked back to her husband's room. She had just stopped for a coffee break and called Sadie to check on her kids. She was very surprised when Sadie told her that Madison had left in a hurry with Tyler and didn't tell Sadie where she was going. Jude calmed Sadie down and told her it was ok…Tyler was safe driver and caring friend and Madison was a smart girl…she would be fine. Jude knew exactly where Madison was headed…to see her father.

Jude opened the door and heard Madison's sobs…heard Madison's soft voice as she talked to her father. Contemplating whether to go in or stay out, Jude quietly shut the door to a bare crack and listened in…

"Daddy, do you remember when you and Mom told me that Mom was pregnant? That I was going to be a big sister? It was almost 4 years ago. I do. I was so upset.

_"Madison Brooke, can you please come in here for a second? You're mother and I need to talk to you." The small 12 year old with long red hair could be seen running down the stairway like a two-year-old running to candy._

_"Yea…what is it?" the girl asked her parents as she joined them on the couch._

_"Well, honey, we have a gift for you." Jude's eyes lit up as she talked to her small child._

_"Are you sure it's for me? It's not my birthday…we still have 3 months until then. It's not Christmas…there's still 7 months til that. So why do you have a gift for me?" the little girl asked._

_"Well, girl it's a special gift. It's not for anything like your birthday or Christmas…it's different…it's special." Tommy said as he took the box from behind his back and gave it to his excited little girl._

_"Ok. Well here goes nothing." Madison exclaimed as she tore into the beautifully wrapped gift._

_"Mom…Dad…I don't understand…what is this?" the confused 12 year old looked up from the pink t-shirt she was holding and back and forth to her parents._

_"Well honey. What does it say?" Jude asked a little worried that Madison didn't quite understand._

_"It says….it says….Big Sister. But mom…I'm not a big sister. I'm an only child, and I love it that way...I mean sometimes I wish I could be like Tyler and Jason and be a twin...but I couldn't ever be like Liz and have a lot of brothers and sisters." Madison looked up to her mother._

_Jude was at a loss for words. She didn't know what to say. How was she going to tell her only daughter that she was going to be a big sister? Her only daughter that had just told her that she loved being an only child. Her only daughter that had pretty much just told Jude that she didn't want the baby that Jude was carrying. Jude looked over to her husband…she needed his help. With pleeing eyes, Jude looked into Tommy's eyes as to ask for help._

_"Madison…we understand that you love being an only child…we spoil you way to much, and so does your Aunt Sadie and your grandma Tori and grandpa Stuart and everyone else for that matter…Jamie, Kat, Kwest, Georgia, heck, even EJ…but honey that shirt…it tells it like it is…you are going to be a big sister in about 6 months. Your mother…well…she is pregnant. She is going to have a baby…boy or girl…and we are going to love it. All of us…we are going to be a bigger family, with a new addition." Tommy responded to his daughter taking her in his arms._

_"Ok…but I still don't' understand. After 12 years…12 years…I am 12 years old…why did you have to wait 12 years to have another kid…whey couldn't it be 2 years like you and Aunt Sadie, mom? Or even 3 years like you and Khara, dad? Huh…why?" the upset little girl asked her parents. "I mean…yes for a while I had wanted a little brother or sister…one I could play dress up and house with if it was a girl or I could play baseball and basketball with if it was a boy…I can't do that stuff anymore…I am too old."_

"_No…no honey…you aren't too old…listen to me…yes your mom and Sadie are only 2 years apart and me and Khara are only 3, but Braden is 6 years older than I am and growing up when we were kids…when I was 7 or 8 and Braden was 13 or 14, we were close. We did everything together…we played ball and all that stuff….and you will do that with this baby…you will love him or her and be the BEST big sister there is….this baby will love you and you can teach him or her anything and everything…it will be alright..you'll see." Tommy responded to his daughter once again._

"_You're right. Dad, Mom…congratulations." The little girl got up and wiped the tears out of her eyes as she hugged both her parents. "You'll see…I'll be a great sister…this baby won't know what hit it."_

"Daddy, do you remember? You made everything better…I was scared that we weren't going to be close…me and Austin…but we are…he's only 3 and he follows me everywhere. Sometimes it annoys me and then I look down at him, and know that I could never be annoyed by him. He's our little Austin. Our baby… just like you said he would be. Daddy, you have to get better..for us all 3 of us, mom, me and Austin. Daddy, get better for our family all 4 of us…I know you will and can…and I'm just waiting for you to do it." Madison said talking to her father once again.

Jude couldn't handle it…she had to get away from that door…what would happen to her family if Tommy didn't make it? She just didn't know…how was she going to be able to finish raising Madison? She's only 15..almost 16…she still has 2 more years of high school and then college…and many boys to come…weddings and babies….and then there's Austin. He's only 3. He has his whole life ahead of him…what if Tommy isn't there to help her raise their little boy…their precious little boy…Tommy Jr as Jude sometimes called him…with Tommy's eyes and Tommy's hair and Tommy's features…he still had preschool and kindergarten and ball games and everything.

Jude turned around just in time to find a chair to sit in before she collapsed on the floor. She sat in the chair and just cried…cried for she didn't know how long…cried for God to bring her husband back to her.

"Daddy…I love you, and I know you're going to come back to us…I will always love you." Madison finished as she got up and waked out of the hospital room.

Jude got up from her chair and walked over to where her daughter had just went.

"Madison honey, are you ok?" Jude asked concerned for her daughter. She couldn't take that much more…she had always been a daddy's girl and this was killing her inside.

"Yea mom. It's alright. I'm just going to go home. Is it ok if Tyler gives me a ride. He's visiting his cousin right now…she just had a baby…a girl named Trista Ann. Isn't that a cute name, mom? Trista Ann…I like it." Madison replied to her mother.

"Sure is honey. And yes it's fine if Tyler gives you a ride…will you just go by Aunt Sadie's and pick up Austin. His seat is in Sadie's car. Please, please, please be careful with him…and tell Tyler to drive safe…I know he does anyways…but with both my kids in that car…I just want to make sure you guys are safe." Jude replied.

"Ok thanks mom. I'll call you when we get home…and about leaving Sadie's earlier…"

"Aunt Sadie…honey." Jude corrected her daughter laughing.

"Sorry mom. About leaving AUNT SADIE's…I'm really sorry…I know I should have told her where I was going…but I just had to get out of there you know…so I called Ty and he said he'd come get me."

"I know honey, and it's ok…just don't ever, and I mean EVER do it again." Jude replied to her daughter once again.

"Hey Mad. Jude how are you doing?" Tyler asked walking up to the mother and daughter.

"Oh hi Tyler. I'm alright. You guys better go…please just be careful Tyler…you have my children in your car." Jude replied kissing her daughter on the forehead and saying good bye to Tyler.

"I love you mom."

"I love you too, honey…be careful."

And with that, the two children left and Jude made her way back to Tommy's room.

"Tommy, honey…it's me again. I know that Maddy was just in here and it probably hurt you to hear her words…and I'm sorry…but what she said Tommy…about you needing to get better for our family…all 4 or us…she was right. You can get better and you need to get better. We need you, honey, and we all know that you need us. That little girl that just came in here, Tommy, she is YOUR little girl…she is defiantly her daddy's little girl…she always will be…and that beautiful baby boy…he's our little boy…our baby boy…Tommy our family will be back together again…I'm praying for that day to come where we can sit at the dining room table again as a family…where the doctors come to me and say….Mrs. Quincy, your husband has woken up. You can all go home again." Jude spoke softly to her husband as she stroke his hair and held his hand.

"You know something…Tommy…I've prayed over and over that God would bring you to me all them years ago…when we were apart…I prayed that everything would be fine on our wedding day…when it was storming and family wasn't going to be able to get here, prayed when I went into labor twice with the Quincy children…and God hasn't let me down yet. He won't let me down…I know that. I'm couldn't on it. I'm waiting til he answers my prayers and you are better. Tommy, I love you with all of my heart and soul…. with everything that is in me, with everything that IS me." Jude cried to her husband as she kissed his head.

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**A/N:** OK. Well there you have it. Chapter 4. I hope everyone liked it. I enjoyed writing this chapter. It took a while to write though…Please let me know what you think. I am thinking that the next chapter or one after that will be a reminiscence about Tommy and Jude's wedding…anyone have ideas for that if so either leave a response or email me… ….. but seriously, this chapter was pretty long to me..about 6 pages on my word. I hope you liked it. And I promise..it will get more into story like soon...with more characters...more Sadie, Kat, Jamie...Jude's parents...more EJ, Kwest, and Georgia...andbelieve it or not...some of Tommy's family.Please respond….it don't take long to review and it makes me HAPPY thanks all -Brandy 


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